7 Things That Can Discourage You on Your Natural Hair Journey

Going natural is exciting… until it isn’t.
If you’ve done the big chop or started transitioning, you already know the journey can test your patience, confidence, and commitment. From bad hair days to unsolicited opinions, discouragement can creep in fast. Here are 7 common things that can discourage you on your natural hair journey—and how to keep going anyway.

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1. The Length of Your Hair After the Big Chop

Let’s be honest: the big chop doesn’t always turn out as cute as we imagined.After my big chop, I was frustrated. My hair didn’t behave the way I thought it would. No gel could define my curls, wash-and-go styles were a struggle, and the biggest heartbreak of all—I couldn’t put my hair in a bun. Short natural hair can feel limiting, especially when you’re still learning your curl pattern and what products actually work for your hair.

Truth: Short hair doesn’t mean unhealthy hair. It means new growth and a fresh start.

2. People Around You Don’t Support Your Natural Hair

This one hurts the most. My husband loves straight hair and hates buns, so my natural hair wasn’t exactly celebrated at home. My mother-in-law was shocked when I told her I would never relax my hair again. A coworker even told me she’d “never go natural” because it’s too hard to manage.

Sounds familiar? People project their fears onto your journey. That doesn’t mean they’re right.

Reminder: You’re not growing your hair for them. You’re growing it for you. Your freedom is the prize!

3. Bad Hair Days Will Test Your Faith

One bad hair day can make you question everything—especially if you still have a relaxer hiding somewhere in your house. I’ll never forget the first time I used amla oil. My hair turned hard, thick, tangled, and shrunk straight down to my scalp. It was unmanageable, and I was ready to give up. Certain products will not work for your hair, and that’s okay.

Lesson: A bad hair day is feedback, not failure.

4. Limited Hairstyles After the Big Chop

Freshly big-chopped hair doesn’t always cooperate. You can’t straighten it. Twist-outs may flop. Some styles just won’t hit right yet. When your styling options are limited, discouragement can sneak in fast—especially if you’re used to versatility.

Good news: This phase is temporary. Your styling options will expand as your hair grows and strengthens.

5. Keeping Your Hair Manageable After Wash Day

Even with the right shampoo, conditioner, moisturizer, sealer, and leave-in, things can still go left. I remember one Saturday when I used a hair dryer and my hair came out crunchy and stiff. It took two full days to get it back to normal. Natural hair is sensitive to tools, heat, and product overload.

Pro tip: Pay attention to what leaves your hair dry or brittle—and stop using it.

6. Setting Unrealistic Hair Goals

Hair grows about ½ inch per month—that’s roughly 1 inch every two months. You will not have two inches of growth in two months unless you’re using a miracle (or a growth hormone). Setting unrealistic goals sets you up for disappointment.

Better approach: Focus on healthy habits, not rapid results.

7. Forgetting About the Destination

I once heard a YouTuber say, “I don’t look good with short hair, but I’ll be really happy when my hair is longer.” I felt that in my soul. When you focus only on the struggle, you forget why you started. I’ve seen women who began their natural hair journey two years ago—and now they have long, beautiful, thriving hair. Keep your eyes on the destination, not just the journey.

Final Encouragement for Your Natural Hair Journey

If you’re feeling discouraged, here’s what I want you to remember:

• Stop worrying about what people think—this journey is yours
• Set realistic goals (or none at all) to avoid disappointment
• Use wigs or extensions if short hair overwhelms you
• Try micro braids with hair that matches your texture for versatility
• Avoid products and tools that leave your hair dry or crunchy
• Trust the process—there is light at the end of the tunnel

Natural hair isn’t easy, but it is worth it.